Funny not so funny....
I've had a MAJOR BREAKDOWN over these last 2 years-and it hasn't been pretty.
What do I mean?
I mean I FELL APART. Messy. Ugly.
Running towards self destructive and dangerous situations.
Everything I'm familiar with and all the things I'd come to love about my life fell apart, Completely.
And I have not had a clue how to fix it.
The challenge....Letting go of my old life.
Familiarity. Comfort. Everything I worked so hard to create. The beautiful gardens my kids and I spent 13 years building, filled with memories of kids playing and children's happy laughter echoing though the trees, Where I sought refuge and learned many lessons. The pottery and welding studios where we sculpted clay, doing ART. Where I bonded with many folks who face life's issues.
The event space where we hosted Musicians, Artists and guest speakers. My community.
My Yoga room. Our trees,
Does it really matter?
No and Yes.
I know what matters.
Surrender is only part of the process.
That's the part where you give up the fight. Conserve your energy for the next stage, where your energy is used more proficiently.
Embracing the changes so that authentic creativity can become the love in action necessary to build the foundation for the next phase of my life.
Establishing self trust again.
Basic stuff like simple routines, exercise, eating well, sleeping well, resting when I need to, writing, connecting with friends and staying true to myself. Dancing, because it makes me feel good and very, very happy.
Developing feelings of worthiness because I am.